Sadhana for Families

Family can be defined simply as a group of people who are close, who may or may not be related to one another, and who live together. This may include children, young people, their parents and elders. Families share the full spectrum of life together – the joys, pains, sorrows, triumphs, disappointments, laughter, conflicts and love. Bhakti yoga practices and principles help to lift and lighten the mood in the family environment by refining and releasing the raw energy of emotions. Through bhakti yoga, families can foster and express positive feelings, allowing for the optimum psychological and emotional development of all family members.

Children and young people spontaneously imbibe the teachings of bhakti yoga when the parents and elders provide positive role models and examples of the healthy management of emotions. Daily situations and inspiring stories can be used to educate children about positive qualities and virtues, including the spirit of service, feeling oneness with all, and connecting with contentment in all circumstances. When children become sad, anxious, fearful or angry, they can be helped by being given the safety to experience the emotion in full and then guided to generate the opposite, positive emotion. The emotional state of the parents directly and deeply impacts the mental and emotional state of their children. It is therefore necessary for parents themselves to work on their own conditionings to bring the raw energy of emotion under control and to fill themselves with positive emotions.

Correcting children’s behavior should be through creative, positive and gentle means using the yamas and niyamas as a guideline. Meanwhile, plenty of space should be allowed for exploration, self-discovery and a healthy quantum of mischief. If children are continuously suppressed, the natural process of learning, self-expression and development is impeded, leading to mental and emotional frustrations later in life. Children should be encouraged to self-correct without guilt or fear.

Needs of the family

• Emotional and psychological health and wellbeing of all members of the family;

• Release of built-up emotional energy and tensions between family members;

• Tools to connect with positive feelings;

• Strengthening the ability to face difficulties and to manage together as a family whatever arises, whether positive or negative;

• Positive principles that bind the family and practically support the development of all members.

BHAKTI YOGA SADHANA

Unlike the individual sadhanas given elsewhere, it is suggested that these practices are done together as family activities.

General

• Agreeing a set of positive qualities for the family to follow for one month at a time;

• Weekly, monthly or as part of an anushthana, chanting parts of the Ramacharitamanas, Bhagavad Gita;

• To cultivate the virtue of seva, spending time as a family visiting lonely or old people, planning outings for children at an orphanage, or offering service to any others in need. At home, giving responsibility to the children or young people for looking after any plants in the house and feeding and caring for family pets.

Evening

• Reading or telling stories of sages, saints, or highlighting any good deeds and inspiring examples.

Weekly

• Chanting of Mahamrityunjaya mantra 108 times on Saturday nights with family or friends in a group, with a sankalpa for the wellbeing of all;

• Kirtan as a family group or together with friends, encouraging each member of the family to sing, clap and keep rhythm with instruments.

  
  

Other lifestyle guidelines for families

A regular and disciplined routine in the family home sets the foundation for a balanced, healthy and harmonious home environment. Fixed times for meals, sleep, cleaning, study, recreation and the use of digital devices provide a backdrop of sensorial restraint in which conflicts and arguments are minimized and practices of emotional management can flourish.

Developing moderation and balance in eating, waking up early in the morning and going to sleep early in the evening keep the body and brain refreshed. Regular sleeping hours and sufficient sleep also reduce bad temper and emotional outbursts, especially in children who can get cranky when tired.

The usage of digital devices in the household can be agreed at set times. For instance, usage can begin after breakfast (not before) and come to an end one hour or two hours before bed, and not during any meals. During meals, the family should aim to spend time together without interruption from phones and other devices, thereby relaxation is promoted allowing for optimal digestive function. The family may make a sankalpa or resolve to participate in digital fasting for one day per week: no mobiles, internet, television, computers, iPads, and so on.

Positive boundaries on sensorial distractions give the family time and space together to pursue common interests. This can include day trips to a local park, museum, botanical garden, a forest or to the seaside, or simply spending time together reading stories or playing games. This is important for the emotional wellbeing of all family members.

Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, to all the people you can, in every place you can, at all times you can, with all zeal, strength, love, heart and interest you can, as long as ever you can.

                                                                                                Swami Sivananda Saraswati

Your family, your home, should become like an ashram where your children can play, where they can read and talk to you as if you were friends. However, if you live only for yourself and your family, you cannot be happy. You and your family are nothing in this universe. When you and your family live for others, only then does your life have meaning. When you live only for others, God will definitely shower His blessings and grace on you.

                                                                                                Swami Satyananda Saraswati

When people begin to respect the sensitive nature and desires of each member in the family, then family life becomes very full.

                                                                        Swami Niranjanananda Saraswati